RUINS OF CHILDHOOD is an excavation and recontextualisation of a childhood spent in the 20th Century.

Originally posted on October 22nd, 2020

THE EPIC TALE OF ISHTAR (BUT IT’S THE ONE WITH WARREN BEATTY) PART 1 of 2.

I just spent 4 dollars to stream ISHTAR. I thought it was streaming for free but, apparently, not on any of the services I pay for. I haven’t watched it yet. I actually have never even seen it. And its not like its a required topic for next week’s podcast so, being unemployed and budgeting for the impending winter, just what do I hope to achieve in watching ISHTAR?

For a time the film “ISHTAR” was short hand for “failure.” It was a flop. Possibly the biggest flop in a decade that gave us Grease 2, Stayin’ Alive and (full disclosure, one of my favorite films) Howard The Duck. It stared Hollywood royalty Warren Beaty, it was directed by comedy legend Elaine May and it was universally panned by critics of the time. I didn’t know anyone who actually saw it yet, everyone I knew, knew it was awful.

The film must have come to video and screened a bit on Cinemax but who cared. We already knew how to talk about it. We made our MST3K references, wrote our half hour comedy hours and penned our entry applications to grad school with pre-planned, off-the-cuff references to how bad ISHTAR was. And everyone laughed and everyone got it because we were hilariously deflating the hubris of Hollywood.

Its relevance as a reference has faded thanks in part to the less than healthy openings of Waterworld, Cutthroat Island and a LOT of Johnny Depp comedies. As a result, I haven’t taken down anything with the once-epic comparison to ISHTAR since my mid 20s. And having just turned 45 that’s nearly two decades of … well… not saying the title ISHTAR.

And its not like I haven’t had the chance. There was a whole movie called MONSTER TRUCKS. And with the always present platforms of Twitter, Facebook and this website there are more than ample opportunities to “yes and…” a comparison to ISHTAR. But I haven’t. And no one else has either. Because the world has stopped Mad-libbing it into conversation. Which brings me around to that question proposed at the start … what do I hope to achieve in watching ISHTAR?

Perhaps I need an origin story for that Mumbles scene in Dick Tracey (1990). Or a distraction from all those other scenes in Dick Tracey (1990). Or maybe I’m after something deeper. Something that would smash taboos and break pop culture wide open. Perhaps an explanation toward how how a film could be so reviled and so revered at the same time.

Basically what I’m looking to achieve in finally streaming ISHTAR is to glimpse the divine. I want to see how something deemed a failure in its medium is more quickly recalled than whatever actually won Best Picture that year So in the simplest and most straight forward response to that question I initially proposed … what I am hoping to achieve in streaming ISHTAR … is to learn how one builds a god.

Tim Blevins will return in one hour and forty-seven minutes, having possibly achieved godhood, with HAVING JUST SEEN ISHTAR.